Love❤ and Relationship

Hello everyone! This is going to be another kind of post that I do not usually do. I have to admit that the later story on Jeannie Mai and Jeezy's relationship really broke my heart. This is a couple who seems to be going strong. This is a couple who seems to be perfect and united but we were wrong because recently Jeezy filed for divorce after 2 years of marriage. It is sad knowing how Jeannie Mai opened her heart about her past relationship and past trauma of her childhood. This is sad also knowing how she vehemently told to the world on TV that she did not want to have a child for many reasons (By the way I will have a post on such matter: Women who decide not to have children and people babyshaming them for no good reasons) and that later on, after meeting and being with Jeezy, she finally decided to have a child with a man with who she felt safe at last. I guess ...she did not know him enough or he was not what he made her feel. Now Jeannie is with a baby on her hands and the man that she respects so much is leaving. I truly do not understand men nowadays. I say and say it again there is no gentlemen in this world anymore. The gentlemen are left in the old days. Those of our parents. The men that we have now are just... a huge disappointment. ( I do not talk about exception. I talk about case in general. How they behave. It is sad and deceiving.)

(Picture source : People magazine) See, people sharing their perfect personal lives as a couple, posting beautiful pictures of loving kissing etc on social media means nothing. I mean absolutely Nothing. Do not get distracted by that. The real happy people most of the times, live in discretion. You will see Nothing about their love life. I know some people you don't know if they are married or not, you just see them doing their jobs, sharing some nice contents on social media. It does not mean that they are not happy or single. It just means that they need their private personal lives in the discretion box. I think it is a good manner of living. See, people writting big loving words to someone or shouting all their love to someone on TV or on public videos, all this means absolutely nothing because you do not know what is really happening behind closed 🚪doors. Dear readers as I always say: "Do not envy what you don't know!" Never ever envy someone else life. Never! Because only God knows the Truth. Really, the story of Jeannie Mai and Jeezy breaks my heart. ***** ***** The couple brought to the world this beautiful baby girl named Monaco that we all love and, jeannie Mai loves her so so much. I think she was surprised by the news like we were too because few days before that she posted a beautiful video with her daughter congratulating her husband . I guess she was shocked to learn what Jeezy decided to do anyway. This is shocking really. How can a man do such thing without telling you ahead of time? This is betrayal to me! Some men are sneaky. Some men are certainly good at back stabbing their love ones ...I mean I don't know all the development behind that relationship but serioulsy it is shocking. Nobody is perfect I know but this is not the way. As a woman, my heart is really sad for her. I will simply say Jeannie should wipe her tears, stand up again and move on with her life. She should not trust that kind of love. It is really sad to say it but it is unfortunately reality. Seeing their pictures on social media could not make me feel like something was wrong behind closed 🚪door. but it tells a lot about our days when it comes to love and relationship. If they still work on their marriage, ok why not? If they try since they love each other I hpe then...yes. But she should probably let it go and move on to a new chapter of her life. My mother often told me: "Do not love a man more than yourself. When a woman loves her man more than he loves her...it is not a safe and healthy relationship." The news report that it was due to some MINOR issues that made him file for divorce. Did you say Minor issues? o well... This sad story brings me to write this post on love and relationship in my blog today. Something that I barely talk about because I do not like to talk about it. To me love and relationship are very disappointing. People will Always disappoint you. That's why I wish I could only be on my own and never have any feeling for someone. Only love for God and my children that's all. Today I understand the verses in the Bible when Apostle Paul elaborates on marriage and relationship.“To the unmarried and the widows I say that it is good for them to remain single, as I am. But if they cannot exercise self-control, they should marry. For it is better to marry than to burn with passion” (1 Corinthians 7:8-9) But at the end Apostle Paul says being single is better.

Some people can be at their best and doing great things when they are single because they feel free. Others need to be married but married to the RIGHT person in order for them to do great things. They become at their best. I understand it a lot today. If you are married and happy I say good for you! If you are happy and living single life I say it is even better than being entangled in a bad relationship. Love is like a lottery. You picked the right or the wrong ticket. You win or you lose. You are married and you exceed in your life for the best and you are stable and happy. Or you are married and you see your life going backwards. Just sadness and frustration. Constant frustration, no evolution, struggles. You have No more inspiration and creativity . tgen you understand that:"It was simply not a good match". It is nobody's fault. Sometimes our decision, our choices are the reason of it. If you are in a happy marriage, then be thankful to God. Say thanks everyday because other people are struggling in this area of their lives and it is not funny at all. It damages emotionally a lot and can kill your joy of living. Really I wish to be sometimes not interested at all by men and live my life at peace and I will definitely work on that unless God has a different plan for me in the future. Never say Never. Women, we need men but only GOOD MEN or stay alone. Stay single. It won't hurt. Really it won't hurt. At least you can do whatever you want, enjoy your single life for the best.

Love and Relationship are definitely the most difficult part of life. You don't know who to trust. You don't know if that person worth your heart and trust. You don't know what he or she (if it is a woman) will do with your heart and mind. Everytime I pray for my son to meet the Right woman for his life when he will grow up to be a man. I really pray that for him. It is so horrible to wake up to a monster, a cheater, a liar, a manipulator, a crook, an abuser, a control freak and the list goes on. It will be sad to meet and marry the wrong woman because that will be a struggle in his life. Instead of soaring and striving , he will constantly be struggling because of the wrong choice. So God please spare him this situation. Protect him from rushing into a relationship. Take your time! Even if it takes longer than others TAKE YOUR TIME. There is NO competition in getting married. I admit that nobody is perfect but at least it would be great to respect each other. This is my short list of the people (man or woman ) to Absolutely Avoid in a relationship. I might be wrong but seriously after living, seeing, observing, witnessing this is it. I share my little experience: 1/ The Abuser: Any type of abuser is a NO NO. Verbal abuse, physical abuse, emotional abuse. You cannot live with that type of person. You will likely end up living in fear, stress, insecurities and mental health issues in the long term. Run away! Run away from them or avoid them period. The lack of respect is unacceptable. He or she doesn't respect you, does not respect and embrace your family. He or she is saying stuff to offend you. Cussing you. No way! Leave the place. It is non negotiable. 2/ The Liar and Cheater I mean...really? The fact that he or she (for a woman) is already seeing someone else while he or she still has you under the hands. This is the disrespect of it. Or the one saying they love you but they love someone else? or they see someone else? I heard stories from close ones. My cousin telling me how the guy told her : " I love you but you know, I also love another woman. I can't hurt both of you. I must keep you both" Wow! I told her why didn't you punch him or slapped him on the face and leave? Not only he tells you straight on the face that he cheats on you but he tells you that he has no respect for you, no intention to change and no regrets. My dear Bye! Sometimes ask them how they will like to see their mother or sister treated? The same way they do to other people mother and sister's? The disrespect of it. This man is a hidden polygamist for sure . Basically what it means to me is the man or the woman drops their clothes for different eyes/eyesight. The show goes on. Ewww!! No respect for their own bodies. You are going to sleep with two different women (or two men). If you do not respect yourself at least respect the other person for God sake! I do not believe that someone can love two persons the same way at the same time. This is a mental dysfunction. There is always the one that we love the most. Leave the other victim and keep the one that you love. I can never approve polygamy seriously. These men or women are real life human resources managers. Good for those who find their happiness in it good for them. I mean if I ever fall in a polygamy relationship, that man will never have peace even in his sleep. (Same thing for cheating. I do not forget and I will make sure that you remember that). I will make his life miserable and complain every single day. He will have to make a decision. Life is a choice. You can't have it both ways. 3/ The Players Players are that person who makes you feel like there is a possibility when in fact, there is absolutely Not. O God! I know I have been in it more than twice. Presently, I know my friend is going through the same situation. We have been telling him to block that person and to forget about her. We keep begging him to forget about that girl. Listen to me dear readers, When things are NOT clear, just know that you are wasting your time. That person is Already in a relationship. They are just playing with your mind. Playing with people's feelings is horrible , selfish and mean. They never apologize they pretend that everything is fine when they are done with you. But life is a cycle and a wheel. we reap what we sow and I am very careful on that in my own life. It is a divine principle. I believe that someone would do the same to them or they will live something similar or a painful situation in the future. But I told him when nothing is clear do not waste your time. The girl is using his emotion talking to him etc. (When she is already in a relationship I am 100% sure) I even talked to her with precise questions and I got nothing clear as answers. I told him look! forget about her she has a relationship she does not tell you the truth. We ususally waste our time thinking that there is a possibility. Use this time and energy for someone else that truly worth it. No my dear there is NOTHING. absolutley Nothing. Listen to me avoid this type of person in life. Mass destruction manipulator right there..You could use that energy and time for something else or somebody else. They are the players. smooth operators. 4/ The one who is always Right This kind of person you can do nothing good for them no matter what. They are always right even when they are wrong. Your discussion will take you nowhere. There is no way to be happy with that kind of person because they never apo;logize even when they hurt your feelings. 5/ The one who has never healed his trauma and his past breakups He will take that on you. You will definitely be the next victim. They will want you to fill the blank of their lives. They will use you ooo run away my dear! Some of them will make you feel bad and in competition because of their low self esteem. They will put all of their anger and trauma on you. Trauma can be: Bad family divorce, abusive parents, bad memories, breakups, abuses of any kind... They might repeat the same thing on you be careful. If that person is still hurt and wounded please send him or her to therapy first. They are never happy on their own. They will search for happiness outside of themselves. They can't be happy on their own. They need someone to be happy which is extremely dangerous. They will be depressive whenever things are not going their way. You are going to be their forever therapist and their punching bag. By the time you are taking care of their trauma of the past you are going to feel drained and empty and they will still require you to be happy around them and support both of you. You will feel like carrying a big Rock on your back everyday, and you will end up being depressive yourself with possibilities of mental health issues with time. i am telling you avoid them. Ask them or tell them:"please go see a therapist first, try to heal from your wounds... I can't help you my dear. I will wait for you by the time you recover." before jum,ping into a relationship with them. If you observe their love life some of them are never stable. they will go from one woman or man to another without healing the past process. I beg! no thank you . They had past or recent break up(s) and they want you or use you to fill the loneliness or the sadness of their past love. They will use you this is not love. run away. 6/ The Undecided one the one who never make decisions. You can be here with them for years they still dont know what they want but they will blame you for not making decision for them. Decision that they should take themselves btw. They are like kids. Their mom and dad must decide for them too. Ooooo goodness! We can't be perfect I know and I admit but these are the things that will bring you pain if you are around these type of people. Do not even try something with them. O! And last! the man or the woman who wants you to look in a certain way. My take on this kind of person is to tell them to go find the woman or the man they are looking for. You found me in or with a certain style or way do not ask me to change for your eyes or whatever. You are not my mother or my father. You should accept me the way I am. They want to transform you the way they see women or men. Nop! go find your doll. Thank you. Respect yourself, Go find your miss or mister perfect. I will not transform EVERYTHING about me for you to please you unless you do the SAME. You want to dominate someone go find your victim somewhere else. Not me! Christ died on the cross for me so that I can be free. I do not need another bondage. I think i am done for this post tonight I close this post with two videos of a lady that I watch on youtube this past few months. With time and the age I have now I am more and more careful about some details (the red flags!). Today I understand that it is important to always ASK THE RIGHT QUESTIONS. THE UNCOMFORTABLE QUESTIONS!I was naive and ignorant before but today no more...We learn from our mistakes right? Ladies if a man doesn't want you Do NOT RUN after him. Do not waste your time. You worth more than that. There is always someone who will love you the way you are. You are not arrogant or a princess with the pea. You are simply you. Just be you.

second video that I found interesting

and last being ghosted. Yes being ghosted hurts. It really hurts but Just understand that the bottom line is he has never been serious from the beginning. So forget about him or her. I beg! life worth more than that. Move on! it is ok to cry if it hurts but remember not to stay in this sadness too long. Go to the next chapter. Life is too short. There are many other videos she made about relationship topic